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August 24, 2011
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30 Ways to Ensure Death at the Hands of TFP Breakdown

1. Write a lemony BulkheadXBreakdown fanfiction.

2. Push him out the window and into the waiting arms of his fangirls.

3. Spike his energon with Viagra.

4. Put bubblegum on his eye patch.

5. Dress yourself up as one of the "Knights Who Say 'Ne' and follow him around while repeating the word "Ne" in an extremely high-pitched voice.

6. Hug him.

7. Tightly.

8. Brag to everyone you see that Breakdown has the BIGGEST crush on Airachnid.

9. Dress as Santa Claus in the middle of June and force every Minibot you see to sit in your lap and recant a list of desired items.

10. Dress as a rabbi and attempt to "fly" off the deck of the Nemesis.

11. Make up a parody of "Which Backstreet Boy is Gay?" that goes along the lines of, "-One big 'Con is thaaaaaat way- We all know Breeeeaakdown's gay; Tell me why! Ain't sayin' he likes Knooock Out!  Tell me why!  Ain't sayin' he likes Sooouuundwave!  Tell me why!  Ain't sayin' he likes Staaaaarscream!  I think it's pretty obvious…  We all know, Breeeeaakdown's gay!".

12. Beat him with a straw hat.

13. Hire a little Mexican man to follow him around wide-eyed.

14. Begin a random break dance on his recharge berth.

15. Find a dead bird, one that has likely been sitting in the hot sun for about 10 hours.  Hold it by the wing, and repeatedly shove it into Breakdown's face, declaring that, "IT LOVES YOU, BREAKDOWN!"

16. Replace his real hammer with a squeaky rubber hammer.

17. Force him to watch reruns of "Operation Repo".

18. Refer to Megatron as "Rasputin".

19. Tape a picture of Osama bin Laden to his rear end and go all Patriot on it.

20. Scream, "I'M A BIRD!  I'M A BIRD!" without fail in the wee hours of the morning.

21. Attempt to initiate a Cybertronian mating call.

22. Suddenly scream and shove a random object into your mouth.

23. Sing "Hot Mess" by Cobra Starship whenever he is in the room with Knock Out.

24. Use his missing optic as a hacky sack.

25. Arrange to have a "Dress as a Character from David Copperfield Day"…without informing Breakdown.

26. Smoosh a handful of collard greens into his empty optic socket.

27. Smile and tell him he looks like a gorilla using high quantities of anabolic steroids.

28. Go out on a busy stretch of highway and search for a dead skunk, one that has preferably been ran over multiple times.  Take it and put it in the ventilation system leading to Breakdown's quarters.

29. Smile as he goes in and asks what stinks.

30. Stuff his spare parts drawer with My Little Pony toys.

Breakdown's Reaction

"What the frag is all this scrap!?  No one in their right mind would even try to do this to me!  Whoever this 'agi-nekonin' is, she's going to get it!"

As he got up from his computer, he suddenly caught a whiff of a foul odor.  He scowled and opened the hatch to the ventilation system.  To his horror, he saw a decomposing skunk laying in the vents.

"WHO PUT THIS HERE!?!?"

In another room, Starscream and Knock Out snickered despite the fact their hands reeked of the dead mammal.  They quieted down as the larger mech stormed down the hall and resumed snickering.

"Breakdown, where are you going?"  Megatron asked, bored out of his mind.

"I'm going to go kill a human called 'agi-nekonin'!"

"Oh yes, I've been meaning to kill her for a long time over those fanfictions…though the one involving Optimus is quite hilarious…"
Oh Breakdown...you cannot escape the wrath of your fans and you cannot escape the 30 Ways.

PS, I don't know if I spelled hacky sack right or if I'm calling it the right thing...
Add a Comment:
 
:iconalice-cry11:
Alice-cry11 Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2014
OMG watch someone make a fanfion on this XD 
Reply
:iconraverdragon:
RaverDragon Featured By Owner Apr 24, 2014  Student General Artist
What the Frag? That end though! LMAO!!!!rofl 
Reply
:iconvectorwave756:
Vectorwave756 Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Even if I die, I'm so doing this!!
Reply
:iconmarathecombinadetcat:
MaraTheCombinadetCat Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Prepare my funeral friends....because I'm so doing this.
Reply
:iconnyxiandragoness:
NyxianDragoness Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I think it's spelled Hacky-sack. I might be wrong, though.
Reply
:icontfp-kittyconknockout:
TFP-KittyconKnockout Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
1. Write a lemony BulkheadXBreakdown fanfiction.

2. Push him out the window and into the waiting arms of his fangirls.

. Dress yourself up as one of the "Knights Who Say 'Ne' and follow him around while repeating the word "Ne" in an extremely high-pitched voice.

6. Hug him.

7. Tightly.

8. Brag to everyone you see that Breakdown has the BIGGEST crush on Airachnid.

9. Dress as Santa Claus in the middle of June and force every Minibot you see to sit in your lap and recant a list of desired items.

10. Dress as a rabbi and attempt to "fly" off the deck of the Nemesis.

11. Make up a parody of "Which Backstreet Boy is Gay?" that goes along the lines of, "-One big 'Con is thaaaaaat way- We all know Breeeeaakdown's gay; Tell me why! Ain't sayin' he likes Knooock Out! Tell me why! Ain't sayin' he likes Sooouuundwave! Tell me why! Ain't sayin' he likes Staaaaarscream! I think it's pretty obvious… We all know, Breeeeaakdown's gay!".

12. Beat him with a straw hat.

13. Hire a little Mexican man to follow him around wide-eyed.

14. Begin a random break dance on his recharge berth.

15. Find a dead bird, one that has likely been sitting in the hot sun for about 10 hours. Hold it by the wing, and repeatedly shove it into Breakdown's face, declaring that, "IT LOVES YOU, BREAKDOWN!"

16. Replace his real hammer with a squeaky rubber hammer.

17. Force him to watch reruns of "Operation Repo".

18. Refer to Megatron as "Rasputin".

19. Tape a picture of Osama bin Laden to his rear end and go all Patriot on it.

20. Scream, "I'M A BIRD! I'M A BIRD!" without fail in the wee hours of the morning.

21. Attempt to initiate a Cybertronian mating call.

22. Suddenly scream and shove a random object into your mouth.

23. Sing "Hot Mess" by Cobra Starship whenever he is in the room with Knock Out.

24. Use his missing optic as a hacky sack.

25. Arrange to have a "Dress as a Character from David Copperfield Day"…without informing Breakdown.

26. Smoosh a handful of collard greens into his empty optic socket.

27. Smile and tell him he looks like a gorilla using high quantities of anabolic steroids.

28. Go out on a busy stretch of highway and search for a dead skunk, one that has preferably been ran over multiple times. Take it and put it in the ventilation system leading to Breakdown's quarters.

29. Smile as he goes in and asks what stinks.

30. Stuff his spare parts drawer with My Little Pony toys.


*bursts out laughing* I'M SORRY BREAKY~!XD
Reply
:iconseeker-breakdown:
Seeker-Breakdown Featured By Owner May 26, 2013
-_- not funny
Reply
:icontfp-kittyconknockout:
TFP-KittyconKnockout Featured By Owner May 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
X3 Yesh it ish.
Reply
:iconseeker-breakdown:
Seeker-Breakdown Featured By Owner May 26, 2013
Nuh uh
Reply
:icontfp-kittyconknockout:
TFP-KittyconKnockout Featured By Owner May 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
*giggles* Yuh huh~!
Reply
Add a Comment: